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As I get older, I am more concerned with the type of person a guy I am dating is, rather than how many ladies have been with him before me. Obviously, he needs to be disease-free, whether he was a sultan in his Life Before Me or not. But I truly think being a good, kind person is more important than how high or low his number is.

Sure, it would be nice to be with someone as fresh as the new fallen snow, but hello — it’s 2009, and things ain’t what they used to be.

I don’t think it’s ever OK to tell a white lie about how many partners you’ve had — even if you suspect yours might be a smidge or seven above your lover’s. Maybe your number is higher because you were sowing your wild oats in your teens or early 20s and didn’t know any better. Maybe his is lower because he was tied to a tree for much of his upbringing — either way, neither matters.

We’ve all got skeletons in our past. But if you are now a mature adult dating someone you could see a future with, your partner number shouldn’t amount to anything. So if you’re asked, tell. Own up to it, because part of a strong foundation in a healthy, lasting relationship is honesty.

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